all things getting harder as i get older: new stacks, new architectures, you name it. it's a well-worn cliché at this point that we're at our most brilliant when we're young, but, well; the taste and wisdom that come from more than a decade (in my case: almost two decades) of experience counteract that a lot. but it's still a lot to push through the bewilderment. i have to tell myself that holistic understanding (of systems, interconnections, consequences) can take years. i'm no longer young. i'm doing fine.
so given all this i've scheduled a day off. just, a single day off in the summer. to read (i want to finish murakami's a wild sheep chase), to play some video games, take a long walk with the dogs. stay off the work computer for a day.
that didn't quite work out. some things have come up at work: a production deploy that dragged, hoping to sort everything out this morning. then, i'll take the afternoon off, and tomorrow's as well. can't-miss meetings in the morning. so i tell myself.
this position has been incredible in terms of work-life balance: i'm happier and visibly less stressed. it's just: i would like a planned day off that's really a planned day off. i want to see if the protagonist can find the sheep with the star-shaped patch. i want to walk for hours in this cool, sunny weather, then get back, have some supper, make a pot of coffee and start my next book (norweigan wood).