i feel fine. knock on wood. i couldn't sleep last night — my usual after supper coffee decided to actually affect me? — and was up reading til half past midnight. another 70 pages to go on the doorstop i've been reading the last few weeks. once i finally got sleepy, it was restive. strange dreams. people i used to know. i'm getting older, ticking past milestones. living past people. my brain letting me know it's keeping track, even if i'm not going to.
for a long time, i've taken the mindset that aging is a blessing. and it is. yes, i'm older, and my long hair is thinner, and i'm paunchier than i'd like. but i'm still here. my health is good. i'm surrounded by love. i'll take another year.
my birthday's coming up in a couple of weeks. my partner's making me spice cake with brown sugar icing; we're going out with friends to a brewery to have some beers, eat fancy hot dogs, play some crib. i'm still here. life is good.