2026-02-08: the long pull of an old name

talking with an old friend via email, and she called me a nickname i used to go by among my close friends when i was younger, before i moved away, before my first name became the default. nobody asked what i wanted to be called, and so i never corrected them. a name (& something of an identity) fell away.

a few people do still call me it — my sister and brother (which is funny, because i don't really remember them calling me that when were were growing up), and old friends when i'm in town, which i haven't been for at least a decade now. in the place i grew up, i mean. so to get that name in an unexpected context was something of a jolt, in a good way.

yes, i was that. maybe i could be that again.

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